New Year, New You?
January 10, 2025
Author | Hannah Hill
I absolutely fucking hate new year resolutions. They are so stupid. Imagine this: you’ve just spent 2 weeks pretending like the world was on pause. You ate what you wanted, drank what you wanted, threw caution to the wind when it comes to working out/fitness goals, and you emerge from this hazy holiday joy (or dread depending on how you view it)…and now you’re expected to eat salads, workout 5 times a week, do all the healthy coping you can imagine during the deadass cold of winter and darkest time of the year!? Come on. That’s a recipe for disaster for anyone. And for those of us who struggle with high expectations for ourselves, it’s a recipe for lots of negative self-talk to ring in the new year. I encourage you to do something different this year.
Leave something, take something…
When one year ends and another begins, it’s pretty common to think about what happened and what will happen. Lots of my clients are struggling with a positive outlook for 2025 given what’s going on in our world, specifically our country. If you weren’t thrilled with the election results (and let’s be honest…just a little less than half of us weren’t merely not thrilled), it’s hard to imagine what’s to come. I suggest to people to let go of the expectation to create resolutions, instead leaning into the idea of leaving something behind and taking something with you. Perhaps you’re leaving guilt-based decision making behind (yay!) and taking with you the confidence you gained to make different decisions. Someone I recently talked to shared they are leaving behind workouts they despise and taking with them the idea of moving their body in a way that feels good to them. Leave something that doesn’t suit you and take something with you that does! Remember that whatever you leave or take doesn’t have to move mountains. It can be something simple—so often the small changes we make are what lead to bigger more impactful ones.
Identify meaningful changes…
Often our resolutions focus on positive changes we want to make. A lot of us are goal-oriented and things with specific, actionable steps are the most concrete, easy to understand, and easy to assess progress. Sometimes the less tangible things are what will make more of a difference. One of the best resolutions I ever made was “talk less, listen more.” There was no measurable goal for me to achieve but it was a way to instill a type of mindfulness into my professional and personal life that I didn’t have before. And to be honest, it’s a resolution I remind myself of each year. I still talk a lot (because that’s me) but I find myself refraining from inserting thoughts, opinions, suggestions in places where it’s not solicited. And when I notice myself doing those things more frequently, I remind myself of the simple goal to talk less, listen more.
If all else fails, do nothing…
If you find yourself struggling to identify something to change, then maybe there’s not something for you to change. Or maybe you’re not ready for a change. That’s OK! Just because the year is new doesn’t mean you have to be brand new, too. Leaning into the suggestion of taking something positive with you into the new year might mean that you focus on things you’ve already built rather than rebuilding something simply because it’s “the time” to do it. I usually reflect at the start of the new year and if there’s something that has been pesky in my life, I find a way to manage it differently. I also reflect on these things at my annual beach trip: I travel down the shore with my family every August and the beach is my happiest place. I love it there, feel the most connected to myself, and can reflect so easily when looking upon the ocean. So basically, there are at least two times per year during which I set personal goals/intentions and check in to see if I’m doing those things. Not because there’s a list of items to check off but because they provide meaning and value in my life. And that’s the key: doing things that you want to do because you feel they’ll make things better for your existence. Not doing things that you have to do because of some external pressure that’s either societal or otherwise imposed. A good rule of thumb: if you think “I got to do this” it’s probably not the right thing to do. If you think “I get to do this”, you’re on the right track. So, here’s to whatever version of yourself you choose to embody in 2025. Happy New Year!